Wednesday's are special

Here it is Sunday afternoon and i'm already day dreaming about Wednesday. Wednesday is the day of the week that i got my first taste of cuckolding from Mistress Cassie. i was put in the cage by Mistress and in yellow panties by Her lover Blaze.

Wednesdays' yellow panties were the inspiration for Mistress starting Her sissy panty schedule started with Wednesday's yellow for all of Her sissies. Yes, it's a special day and it represents a cage and cuckold day for me. i think i need to show some of my newfound balance here. i'm thinking too much about Wednesday's.

So, i'm going to recognize that day as special every week. Every Wednesday, along with my yellow panties. i'll wear the cage. It will be the one day every week when these three things will come together in a weeklt reminder that i am a trained sissy.

Number1 - i am panty trained. Not only to wear panties 24/7, but which color to wear each day.

Number 2 - That i am caged trained. Not only to cage after each time i masturbate, but cage trained from the beginning by Mistress as She took control. An important symbol of Her control.

Number 3 - That i am Her cuckold.sissy. A training still in progress, started on a Wednesday.

i just love love Tatiana's pretty yellow panties. And this series of pics tells it all.

Here, Her pretty panties on display as She spreads Her legs.. The lovely lace, the lovelier gusset, covering Her Sweet spot. And Her lover, getting ready to enjoy Her breast.

Here, the lover's encroaching hand as he kisses Her.

Here, Her lover covers that lovely gusset. He is denying that lovely view. It has an undeniable element of cuckolding. Denial to the sissy, while he enjoys Her.

Now he's in. i can still see Her panties, but his hand is now inside of them - and i am in my cage, again.

Oh, my!

Yes, Mistress doesn't have any problem with me obsessing about Tatiana and Her panties. Mistress likes the picture game, which i often lose. Sometimes i win, but when Mistress makes me play Her games, i always lose. Mistress always wins. Period.

sissy maid diane

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Advanced panty training

Oh, my! There really is no end to a sissy's training.................

sissy maid diane

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A cuckold's dream

Well, it's Wednesday, yellow cuckold panty day. Last Wednesday i got into all kinds of sissy trouble, culminating in a long weekend of feminization and posting.

i think Wednesday's will always be special because of my first introduction to cuckolding by Mistress Cassie over two years ago on a Wednesday.

And i knew i was struggling when i was looking the the clock last night. Eventually the cage went on at 12:01 a.m Wednesday morning, along with my a fresh pair of yellow panties.

i don't really expect to cage every Wednesday. This is more like a full circle of events that started in motion last Wednesday. But, here i am again, caged without the benefit of masturbation. i must say, the cage goes on much easier without that awful pubic hair interfering.

i must also say that i was perusing some photo's just now from my sissy picture folder. When the above caption appeared, the 'cage gaufge' went off again. True to my promise to post cage gauge moments no matter what the photo, or caption. here it is.

The caption is mine. An expression of why the gauge went off and the cage filled up - quite quickly.Yes, it's another cuckold Wednesday, for a few more hours. We'll see what the rest of the week brings.

sissy maid diane

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The pink fuzzy sweater

On September 28th Mistress Cassie posted about sweater girls. It's all part of Her sissy scavenger hubt game for sissies. Here is my entry.

In Her post She said:

The weather cooled off a bit today, reminding me of soft fuzzy pink sweater girls.    How are my sissy girls doing?
10 points for fuzzy sweater girl pictures. 

Well i bought a fuzzy pink sweater and it is chilly outside. Now that i'm all shaved and painted properly, i really enjoyed wearing the sweater, the skirt - and all the other gurly things. And, i want that 10 points!

Oh my - its is soft and very fuzzy!

The nylons on freshly shaved legs are so sweet, so feminine. i'm confident that i've cured my laziness problem after squeezing into my skirt, pulling it over my sheer nylons. mmmmm

Sweaters do have a way of showing a gurls figure off. Yes, it's getting colder out, but wearing more, warmer clothes clothes isn't necessarily a bad thing.

More sissy assignments and picture sto come!

sissy maid diane

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A sissy shaved (again) and - finally understanding life balance

i'm obsessive.

i obsess about my career, successfully. i deal with and solve complex problems when i'm at work. When i'm not at work i obsess about and process complex problems that are unresolved or problems i can see coming. i'm a workaholic, an obsessive workaholic.

i'm obsessive. Maybe my condition can be 'cured' by therapy. Well, guess what? Mistress Cassie is my therapist, and She's a great therapist.

Yes, i also obsess about Mistress Cassie and my feminization. i am a Mistress Cassieaholic. That's one too many obsessions. Mistress Cassie understands this better than i do.(Like so many things, She understands).
my goodness - She's absolutely therapeutic!

Mistress has often used the word balance when i get consumed by work. Because when that happens (frequently) i turn to Her for release. Then, She consumes me without breaking a sweat.

Balance.

What i've finally come to understand is that i need both, my work and my Mistress. As i grind away at my career, i have to recognize that i'm good at what i do. The dominant traits that i have , that have been identified in tests like the DISC profile, allow me to be good at what i do. i scored (no surprise to me as a high D. Dominant.

Mistress Cassie has Dominant traits as well. A real Female Dominant. And She's extremely intelligent as well. She's great at what She does, but doesn't let it consume Her. If She let's me be entirely consumed by Her, Her work suffers. If i get totally consumed by Her, my income will be negatively affected. i simply won't be able to afford Her. :o)

So, i've accepted that She has won the feminization and Control war. It was bitterly fought by me, and i don't like to lose - at anything. This is a very, very big defeat, and a huge victory for Her. So now, i HAVE to find balance to survive. Mistress is not going away. There's no new war to wage with Her that i can possibly win.

Mistress Cassie has won. Mistress Cassie always wins.i've hard it from Her numerous times. i'm convinced.................

So, yesterday i was looking at the many pictures i took during the penis gag shoot. my bedroom is a mixture of guy things and gurl things. Last year i altered it to be an entirely Female bedroom. Since then, i've been returning some aspects of it to a guy's bedroom. my closet and all of my dresser drawers are still full of lingerie and Female attire. i may put back a drawer for some guy things (never underwear) and put some ties or belts in my closet. i have to dress as a male during work days. i need to save some time looking for male accessories so that i can divert that time to better, more consistent, Female grooming. Balance.

But, i've got deer mounts on the wall. i hunt deer. Now, some may find this offensive and not very sissy like. It's not perceived a sissy pursuit. It's too manly.

Nonsense!!!!!!

Some Women hunt! Get over it, i did.

Women can do anything a man can do! Often better! 

NEWS FLASH - MISTRESS CASSIE NEVER TOLD me THAT i HAD TO REMOVE ALL OF my MALE THINGS FROM my BEDROOM AND MAKE IT A GURL'S ROOM. i DID THAT!

So, if somebody doesn't like the fact that i hunt, go somewhere else on the Web. There's lots of choices out there for the sissy you want to see. i've been hunting for 50 years, it's part of who i am. Mistress has never ever even hinted that i need to give that up. Or many other 'supposedly 'guy' things. (She does make me shave though)  :o)

Again:

Women can do anything a man can do!

So, i'm finally figuring it all out. Mistress will correct me if i'm wrong about this for sure.

Today, i shaved (legs, arms, under arms, chest, stomach, pubic hair, all of it)and here are the pictures. Yes, i'm caged again as well. More importantly, and this is critical, i'm beginning to see the light at the end of my own dark tunnel. Mistress can tease and torment me whenever She wants. But i've got to stop tormenting myself.

Now, if real life balance was easy, i'd announce today that i've found it. More nonsense! What i have found is that by accepting Her victory, i can finally see a way to stop tormenting myself. i am finally on the path to life balance. A path provided by Mistress Cassie. i can stop obsessing about being feminized. i'm there - i lost.

It's probably a good thing that i'm not 20 years old and under the Control of Mistress. Maybe i would give up hunting. Maybe She would put me, and keep me, on the path toward sexual reassignment. Breast implants, hormones, surgery. Such is Her power. But She knows that it's too late for that extreme. i'm pushing 60. But She has accomplished something that 3 1/2 years ago i would have thought impossible.

She has made Herself the key to my happiness - finally. Yes, i know, that's a statement an obsessive person would make. Well, that's me.

i'm not quite there yet, but i feel a lot better about my chances of finding some peace and happiness now. i don't have to worry about winning my life time battle against cross dressing. i have lost that battle.

Now i start my new battle. The battle for balance. i don't have to fight this big battle alone. i have the extremely capable Mistress Cassie to help and guide me. withe Her help, i'll balance diane's needs, 'the hunt guy's' needs - and of course, Hers.

One more thing. Mistress Cassie's Hierarchy. Today when i came (and caged) it wasn't Mistress Cassie's image that i was gazing at, it was Tatiana. Tatiana is the latest in a long line of compelling pictures that play a role in Mistress' heirarchy. She can't feminize me every step of the way. Pictures of Women like Tatiana serve a purpose for Her.

Never once has She mentioned a Model that i have been temporarily obsessed with. Why? Because then it would be about Them. Well, today it was about Tatiana when i came, because She was this week's catalyst that led me to cage on Wednesday, yellow panty day. Wednesday, a day of the week made special by Mistress Cassie. Sure i masturbated while looking at Tatiana. But i caged for Mistress, because that's what She's trained me to do.

Next week, i'll probably stumble onto some new exciting pictures and obsess about them for a while. It's all part of Mistress Cassie's hierarchy.

sissy maid diane

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pussified - what it means

i almost came in my panties when Mistress Cassie first informed me that i had been pussified.


It's been a few months, but i remember it well. i had never heard the term, and She had never used it before that night. So, what does it mean for me?

Well, the short story is this: She has trained me, feminized me to be Her sissy. Now, i'm not easily trained or dominated. i actually have tested as having a dominant personality. How did She do it?


With Her Pussy, of course!

i love Pussy! i have been married 3 times and had other LTR's with various Women. None of them pussified me. Why not? Why - because i was a cross dresser, not a sissy. i was in denial about my cross dressing, which was an undeniable part of my nature, of who i am.

The Women in my life all came to find out, to one degree or another, that i dressed. For a number of reasons They didn't grasp what that really meant. Most likely, They couldn't compute my need for lingerie when They thought of me as a man's man. They also were blinded by Society's determination that real men don't wear panties.

So, They missed the boat, missed the mark.

Here's a much shown picture of Wife number 3's skirt. We argued a lot, and after a number of years seperated. She knew i was a CD and hated it. She was controlling, but missed the obvious weapon for controlling me. my obsession with Women's underwear.

The course of my entire life would have been different if this had happened during any of my relationships with Women. If something like this had ever happened:

Woman: "Honey, we had a bad argument last night. Why don't we calmly sit down this evening and discuss our view points and put this problem behind us.

Me: Okay honey, I don't want to argue.

Woman: Before we get started, I went shopping today. I bought two of the prettiest bra and panty sets imaginable. They are both so silky and feminine. I'm wearing one set right now. It's a black see through nylon set that I just love. I know you will too.

Me: (Thinking - I have won again!) Great! I can't wait to see it.

Woman: The other set is also see through nylon - in pink.

Me: Wow! (Getting hard now) I can't wait to see that too. Let's go!

Woman: But that set is not for me, it's for you. Why don't you go upstairs and look on our bed. You'll find your new pink panties and bra waiting for you. Put them on and come back down. Then, we'll have that discussion. Okay, sweetie?

me: (Hesitantly, but hard as a rock now) Yes, Dear..........

Argument over! And - i didn't win.

That's pretty much what Mistress Cassie did from day one in O/our relationship, only much more aggressively at the beginning. She took my weakness and took Control from the beginning. She knew right away what to do and She's an Expert at feminization. An Expert.

i never stood a chance.

The big news and recent awakening all points to this: i finally, finally understand. It all makes sense now. i know what pussified means. That lifetime of denial is over. Only one Woman of the many i've known could make me understand. One Mistress Cassie. She definitely has a Pussy and She has definitely pussified me.

There is a direct line between where i am now and how i got there, Her Pussy. The ramifications are obvious for even a casual occasional reader of this blog.

i've already said it. i love Pussy and i've had my share. But only One could do this to me. Transform me, make me face who i really am. After all these decades, what are the odds that i'll meet a real life Woman who can understand this transformation? Not likely.

So, i'm not going to put the obvious in writing here. This time, it's too important and permanently life changing to put on my blog. i need to hear it from Her. Because it's real and - it's forever.

sissy maid diane

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Scheduled for the cock cage

sissies like for their Mistress to put them on schedules. It's a sissy's dream. Mistress Cassie has a panty color schedule for all of Her many sissies and it's posted on Her blog. Of course i follow it religiously.

most sissies are needy by nature as well. we need schedules, we need attention. Mistress simply doesn't have time nor is inclined to give specific schedules to every sissy in Her stable.

Her way of 'scheduling'  works something like what i'm doing today. It's very clever. Today i am, for the first time, scheduled by Mistress Cassie to cage. She did not tell me early Friday morning that i would be caging at 6:30 on Sunday. What She did do, was put in motion a series of events during Friday's session. Those events now have me scheduled. How did She do it?

First, i had to wait until Saturday to get out of my cage. Then, i had to complete the penis gag assignment. Then i had to wait another 24 hours before i could cage again. Also, i had to shave this weekend. She was taking the cage away from me, but because of the timeline and events, essentially She was scheduling a return to the cage..

After i shave and dress this afternoon, i will need to masturbate. She knew this. i will need to enjoy the feel of nylon on my freshly shaved legs. i will need to cum like a gurl, dressed like a gurl,  feeling like a gurl - embracing my femininity.

What Mistress didn't say was that i could cum during that forced 24 hour hiatus from the cage. She didn't say i couldn't either. But i've been trained to cum after masturbation. The rare exception was yesterday after the gag assignment. i didn't ask, and i have to assume that the cage denial was another piece of my ongoing training. i can't risk thinking that i can masturbate AGAIN w/o caging.

So, i'm watching the clock. i'll shave shortly & dress. But i need to wait until 6:30 before i can cum. That time for me now is a schedule. i'm planning my day around being shaved and dressed and cumming at 6:30, when my 24 hours is up.

Shazam, i've been cage scheduled. It's really quite ingenious, and it's so Mistress Cassie.

sissy maid diane

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